One of my favorite blogs to read is "Sharisax is Out There," by Sheri Weiss. In her blog titled, "When Communication Adds Up to a Big Fat Zero," she gives tips for becoming an active listener. One of her tips was to leave the word "I" out of the conversation when talking with another. My eyes stopped at that point, unable to read another word. That line had spoken directly to me! Eerie.
I decided to give it a try at the first meeting of Social Media Breakfast/Fort Wayne, this past week. When I went up to the table for check-in, the first question they asked was, "And you are?" It was soon followed by, "Where do you work?" and "What do you do there?" Of course, I answered all three appropriate questions with "I" responses. FAIL! I thought to myself. Perhaps I should have practiced?
Before I had my coffee in hand, I had answered several other questions with "I" responses. I certainly was not going to win "Miss Personality" that morning! Leaving out "I" was so much harder than I thought it would be. "I" was clearly defending its territory in my brain! "I" didn't want to go away. "I" wanted to be present at the social!
Consciously, I forced myself to stay focused on one little word - You! Although I had messed up a few times, my awareness improved with every conversation. Learning to be an active listener would take practice. And with practice it would become easier. By trying this awareness technique, two noteworthy things were discovered that morning:
I decided to give it a try at the first meeting of Social Media Breakfast/Fort Wayne, this past week. When I went up to the table for check-in, the first question they asked was, "And you are?" It was soon followed by, "Where do you work?" and "What do you do there?" Of course, I answered all three appropriate questions with "I" responses. FAIL! I thought to myself. Perhaps I should have practiced?
Before I had my coffee in hand, I had answered several other questions with "I" responses. I certainly was not going to win "Miss Personality" that morning! Leaving out "I" was so much harder than I thought it would be. "I" was clearly defending its territory in my brain! "I" didn't want to go away. "I" wanted to be present at the social!
Consciously, I forced myself to stay focused on one little word - You! Although I had messed up a few times, my awareness improved with every conversation. Learning to be an active listener would take practice. And with practice it would become easier. By trying this awareness technique, two noteworthy things were discovered that morning:
- First, "I" could share the spotlight with "You" and we'd both feel good about the time spent together in conversation.
Now, can someone please tell me what to do with that "me-me-me-me" chorus in the background? ~wink~
- And second, next time make sure I'm the first to ask questions! ~smile~
For a little music with my blog, enjoy Toby Keith's video of
"I Wanna Talk About Me."
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